Sunday, June 29, 2008

A 9 year old's take on death and dying

Kaylea has been in limbo for the past 2 days just like the rest of us. We all have been waiting by the phone for news on Auntie H. We all could hope for a miracle; but, knew that the end was probably very near. There has been a lot of talk about death and dying around our house. The phone has been ringing more than normal and Kaylea has watched me jump to get it each time.

Though Kaylea talks, a lot; she isn't one to share what she is thinking when she is sad. I have to try to start conversations that will engage her and give her a chance to say what is bothering her. Over the past few days, Kaylea hasn't said a lot about how she is feeling about losing Auntie H. We have talked about how sad everyone is and how hard this is on Kaylea's cousins (Auntie H's grandchildren). We have talked about Auntie H going to heaven and getting to see all of her loved ones that died before her. We have talked about Auntie H being in a better place and not having to live with pain any longer.

Kaylea is dealing with our family's loss very well. I often worry about her, though. She has dealt with a lot of loss in her very short life. In 2004 she lost Aunt Thelma (her Great Great Aunt), Uncle Papaw (her Great Uncle), Nana (her Great Grandmother), Uncle Eddie (her Uncle) and Aunt Grace (her Great Great Aunt). Now, she has lost her Aunt Helen. Hopefully, she is coping as well as she appears.


Out of the mouths' of babes

Kaylea after being told Auntie H had passed away:

K: Man, my life sucks!
Me: Why do you say that?
K: Because all of my ancestors are dying!

Bub and I had to remind her how many of her ancestors (such a grown up word for such a little girl) were still alive. She seemed to get some comfort in that.


Missybw said...

I think she just needs a popsicle... I hear those will cure anything. And tell her at least one of her ancestors is alive and doing quite well, thankyouverymuch!

overtly trite said...

that's fantastic 'ya just never know what is going to come spilling out of those mouths some days

Anna said...

Good reminder of what she does have still...but an honest opinion from one of the kiddo kind. I've lost almost all of my "ancestors" and it's lonely the more that they move from this world to the next. But I agree with MissyBW - popsicles do help and I want you all to know that you're held in our hearts as you all manage through this next reminder of how precious our time is here.
Much love and let her know people are thinking about you all!